Archive for September, 2008

Movin’ on Up

I’m rolling out the welcome mat at my new abode, PomJob.com. It was designed by the lovely and talented Jayesel.

If only house-moving was as easy as this, I would be writing to you from a corpse-free home! Bonus: the new Web site is totally prettier than my current house.

My own Wisteria Lane

I’ve been considering moving out on my own for several months now but there are a few things holding me back:

a) I’m lazy and moving is a lot of work.

b) I don’t like asking for help. I can’t move all my crap by myself.

c) I really like the street/area on which I live. It’s mostly families, some older people, a few cops. It’s safe and steps away from the bus stop.

d) Money. I could afford to live on my own but that’s about all I could afford. Right now I’m banking several hundred dollars each month into my ING account to use as a down payment someday.

Last weekend there was a moving truck in the driveway of the rowhome next door. I hadn’t seen the young woman who lived there in many months and the incessant yapping from her ankle biting dog had been noticably absent. Turns out she moved in with her boyfriend, got married, got pregnant, had a baby and just never bothered to clean her stuff out of her father’s house.

When I found out all this, I joked to my roommate that I had been a little concerned and wouldn’t it be horrible if she had disappeared or died?

My roommate talked to her and found out she was planning to rent out the rowhouse.

Perfect! It will make moving easier, I’m already familiar with the neighborhood and the neighbors are pretty cool. I snuck next door and talked to the girl and left my phone number.

I don’t think I’ll be moving into that rowhouse. Today, while talking to the neighbors two doors down, I learned that she went MIA to try to cope with the fact that while she was on vacation, a male friend/roommate died in her house. And no one discovered that he was dead for at least five days.

It’s a crazy tale involving psychology, a roofing accident, drugs and a poor doggy who was trapped in the house with the corpse.

There are plenty of things I dislike about my current home, but if my only other option is living where a guy ODed and then decomposed for five days, I think I can live with stained carpet and an outdated kitchen for a little while longer.

Maybe the college kids who just moved in next door will soon be evicted. I can’t imagine their other neighbors with the newborn will appreciate the neverending beer pong tournaments in the front yard and dance parties in the living room.

ANTCM

This week on America’s Next Top Cult Model…

Photo courtesy of RealityTV.com

Does anyone think the contestant from Alaska looks like a refugee from the YFZ Ranch? Or Big Love? This isn’t the best post to illustrate my theory but the glimpse I caught of her tonight totally did.

(Is it horrible of me to say that?)

Come on and take a free ride

Summer is officially over. How do I know? I was 20 minutes late for work.

A new bus schedule gives me options: leave a couple minutes earlier than usual and allegedly arrive at work at 8:19, or leave a couple minutes later than before and arrive at 8:28. Being the dedicated employee I am, I left a few minutes early and waited. And waited. The bus finally rolled up at 7:56. The doors open and… people start pouring out.

Someone upchucked on the bus.

The upside? The new driver didn’t make me pay.